Air Quality Alert

The owners and operators of and lobbyists for those nasty coal-burning factories and power plants in the midwest just can’t seem to hold onto the idea that prevailing winds in North America blow from west to east.

This self-righteous amnesia enables them to remain enthusiastically innocent of the fact that the crap the coal burners discharge from their tall, tall smokestacks usually ends up in the air we breathe in the northeast. This is on my mind because we are enjoying a spell of it here in Maine right now.

Whenever our Congressional delegation tries to raise awareness of the prevailing wind (a phenomenon the ancients knew well) midwestern senators, representatives and assorted bloviators are shocked, shocked they tell us. Why, they’ve never heard of such a thing! Surely it can’t be true! Who would manipulate the EPA for purposes so nefarious? Immediate action is called for. We need to…form a committee to look into it.

Later, perhaps years later, copies of such a committee’s report would be used as toilet tissue in the cloaking room.

fish head...By means of this political two-step, hang-wringing public concern coupled with cold-eyed indifference as a matter of policy, the northeast has been short-changed on the benefits of the Clean Air Act ever since its inception.

Imagine the outcry if Maine’s seafood processing industry, as a matter of entrenched public policy, began flying its wastewater, heads, tails, shells, skins and guts to Ohio and airdropping them indiscriminately there.

Good morning, Akron! Kersplat!

Hellooooooooooo, Cleveland! Sploosh!

If a protest arose, our senators and representatives would have a ready response: who would manipulate the FAA for purposes so nefarious?

Anyway, have a nice day, Ohio. I imagine the skies are clear there. Not so much here—although this lobster is tasty.

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